Don't Pick a Bone With Me.... Eh? What you say? I cannot HEAR you!

My mind meanders during sports ... you don't have to read... but, it's here if you need it:

January 12, 2019
The most unusual phenomenon occurs to me…. Whenever someone starts a sentence with, “I’ve got a bone to pick with you…”, I go completely deaf. Cannot hear anything after those words are said.

Odd.

Many people somehow want to pick a bone with me. Wait, what? I can’t hear a thing? No, I can’t read lips… and No!, I can’t read words in any language temporarily. Go away… that might help me recuperate…

I don’t want to pick a bone. It’s ‘give a dog a bone, knick knack paddy whack’… That rhyme has something about This Old Man in it, so let’s just let it be and move on…

I like words this week like lubricious, humdinger, and elbow grease. I think there is another way to spell lubricous. Not sure which word I like now.

A long time ago, a wise older woman told me, “To know a kind person, you have to encounter an unkind people…”
It’s a comparison deal.

I mowed her yard and her name was Mrs. Thrasher, a retired teacher and her husband had been named Rainey and she fed dinosaur-size catfish at exactly 5 p.m. every day but did not want me to tell anyone. I was 12 and got $20 to mow her yard. It was acres. In Klondike (Texas, named after Alaska Gold Rush Town...)

She lived to be about 105 years old and when I went for a visit, she had died the week before… I should not have put that visit off …. Recently, I went by her place which is in complete disarray—house falling in, no one mows, and too ‘snake-y’ to try to find the catfish pond. But, she was a kind person. Mrs. Thrasher.
I have encountered unkind folks.

But, mostly, for the most part, I can’t help but believe, I’ve only met kind folks.

But she was right. I damn well know the difference thanks to the unkind ones.

I dream of dreams that were lost. I dream of things I wish I could redo in my life. How I would change this road of life. I wish I could stop all this wishing.

Lost dreams are haunting.

Then… I catch myself short…

This I know is true: I did the best I could with the information I had at the time…

I know I’m not everyone’s favorite type of person, but I have found that there is no need to be so. It makes me love those who love me even more if that is possible.

Maybe my circle of friends has lessened; the amount of love and loyalty has vastly increased.

I cannot figure out if I am a third wheel or a fifth wheel. I’ve been told I’m an odd duck; a funny sort of bird; too honest for your own good; live in my own universe; difficult; easy; caring; uncaring…
I’ve been called ‘this’ and ‘that’.

And, I admit, I am ‘this’ and ‘that’… but I’m the nicest, smartest, and kindest ‘this’ or ‘that’ God ever created…. that’s my daily goal anyway.

I like Dr Pepper Cake. Have you had it…? I like it so much, then ate so much, so that now I hate it. But I recommend you get some and then you can learn to hate it eventually, too.

Like it so much you eat so much that you are sick of it.

Why is it that a Large Running Suit from 1991, size Large, fits perfectly? But today’s Large is like for unrealistically teeny tiny people? A Large from back then is now an XXXXL … you must compare size charts with US, UK, China and Thailand… all have different sizes. To order clothes online, you all but must refer to the formulae charts in the back of a Calculus or Geometry text book. Remember how hard a problem was if you had to refer to the formulae tables? I am having math flashback which is the worst, unfair flashback. To me, Hell is sitting in a non-air-conditioned classroom, after eating Mexican food, windows shut and teacher smoking a cheap cigar…. And having to do hard problems with reference continually to the back of the book’s formulae tables. Hell. Pure D Hell. (Why do we say Pure D? We say it an awful lot in Texas. What have we got against ‘D’ to associate it with Hell?)

When I was young, I thought every town was a ‘Ville’… Stephenville, Lingleville, Seagoville, Greenville, Lewisville, Duncanville.

Well, I can’t think of any others, so I was not really all that confused when I was little.

Lingleville was where our weekend farm was located, and I love just to say the name… “Lingleville”.

Reminded us of Hooterville on TV… Oh, that’s another point of childhood confusion…

As long as I shall ever live, I will never understand that no matter what size tee shirt you buy, the head opening is always a small… you buy an XL shirt, the head opening should also be XL.

I have a wide neck like a Brahma Bull, so I am continually cutting and ripping the neck ‘hems’… I only order V-necks and they need CAPITAL V’s in their neck design.

The thought of a turtle neck makes me smother in frustration expectation. They don’t make turtle neck shirts for Brahma Bulls.

As many olive branches as I have sent, I now am growing an olive tree… not really for me, but for people in hundreds and hundreds of years.

I’m told only the hopeful plant trees.

My Dad was the most hopeful person I have ever known. If there was a patch of ground, he would plant a pecan tree or a fruit tree and of course my job was to water them in the hottest hour of the hottest day in history of weather. And, according to him, I didn’t water the trees ‘long enough’… how is it that time is what measures how much you water trees?

But, I agree, hopeful people plant trees and I’m thankful there were hopeful people long before us.

And squirrels.

They like to plant trees. I wonder if they are hopeful or just forgetful as to where they stashed a pecan or oak nut?

I like phrases like: You get upset at the least little dust up.

Why is it never ‘God’s will’ when something GOOD happens?

What’s your beef with so and so?

Why are you sore at so and so?

When people ask me what I did today, I should be honest and say, “I’ve been really busy—what with forgetting things, losing things, looking for things, and forgetting what things I was looking for….”

But I just say, “Nothin’” when asked what I did today.

To be fair, they never really fixed up anything on “Fixer Upper”… they just built a new house where an old one was.

It was really a “Builder Upper”… I know they are/were popular, but every house they ‘built’ looked the same and the sound of her voice was fingernails on chalkboards… they should have fixed up an old chalkboard rather than paint a newly built chalkboard-ish space… but then fingernails would not have been so annoying.

Batteries cost more than just buying a new gadget.

Repairs cost more than buying a new appliance.

It all goes back to ‘picking a bone’… I’m sure consumers have called corporations and began the damn conversation with that deafening phrase, “I’ve got a bone to pick with you…”

Eh? What you say?