Lights Out in June 2024 ...

 So, this happened. I did something good for all the bad reasons.

No, maybe I did something bad for all the right reasons. Yeah, that’s the ticket.

A couple of Mondays ago … I cleaned out the freezers. Threw away anything which was frost bitten … which was just about everything. But, I got snake bit ridding us of the frost bitten …

I put out FIVE trash cans for the Tuesday ‘solid waste’ pickup. I always put the maximum amount out for the trash day … I feel like I get ‘gypped’ if I don’t … like I don’t get my money’s worth unless I’ve rounded up a lot of trash… kitty commode scoops always top off the garbage take out …

So, Monday night … huge storm. Rain, hail, lightning that was so lightening that the darkness-activated landscape lights were blinking … no idea if night had turned into day. The wind was hellish … And … all sprinkler systems came on despite their moisture detection gauges which are supposed to block all high cost waterings …

And five trash cans (bins…to use a fancy word… the solid waste bins…) turned over, lost their lids and garbage was ‘strewn’ all over creation, tar nation, up and down the location … in the bar ditch also known as the ‘borrowed ditch’ … sort of like airing dirty laundry in public only it was more like soggy-fying the collection of garbage …

So, when all was said and done, I was running around gathering garbage … again … and putting in the newly-dented garbage containers … I was in my Ralph Lauren Polo Madras Robe (Not bragging … I have about 15 … so more revealing my hoarding hobby …)

Wet, stinky garbage … the details are grotesque and gross … but I’d be glad to ‘share’ with you at any given time …

My flashlight was dimming along with my religion … until my neighbor shined a spot light on me to help me … thought that was kind … he had done that once before when nephew’s Chihuahua Molly had been snatched by a coyote and I had to hit the startled coyote with my flip flops … and the neighbor somehow was up at the ass crack of dawn to help me … Molly was freed … took her to the 24 hour veterinarian who saved her … “And that will be $14,000, Mr. Goddard” … (always said to me, every time, leaving a vet’s office) …

Ok… back to the wrong thing for right reasons … so many trees down and a sinkhole in our street and a washed out bridge that isn't fixed yet so everyone takes a detour and turns around in our driveway ... again, I digress ...

Anywho... … there was no solid waste collection the next day … in fact for the next three days … I cannot imagine the gagging of those solid waste removal guys when those bins were opened … must give them more tip money than usual … when I can bare to face them again …

Electricity was out about 48 hours … now … if anyone needs a Come to Jesus experience … do without electricity for 48 hours… the previous week, we had been without electricity for 11 hours … Nothing says PRAYER than NO POWER … I prayed more and with the most enthusiasm during that dark 48 hours than I have since my baptism in the 4th grade combined …

Lesson learned … always, I mean always, have everything charged up … don’t worry about the freezers when a Noah strength storm is predicted … always wear clean underwear and a rain-proof robe …

After the storms and horrendous aftermath was beginning to improve … no lie … two doves appeared at the glass doors … pecking … wanting food … but also isn’t that a sign of grace after tough times?

So, now we have POWER … and 100+ degree temps … Celebrating Mr. Carrier who invented air conditioning … Kind Oncor lineman from out of the area ... here to help ... I heard they had to sleep on the ground but local churches had pot luck meals for them ... He was kind and said tens of tens of homes were on from our transformer being switched back to 'on' ... every light and appliance came on at the same time and it was like Clark Griswald's Christmas Vacation lights ...

More from the pile of notes about what I have to say about ‘sayings’ …

Oh, I guess if I had to admit to a hobby … I’d say it was ‘over-stepping’ …

I over-step often … Over-step my boundaries, my manners, my unvarnished opinions … all this staying in one’s lane concept? … have not perfected that skill … I change lanes as much as I over-step …

I over-step privacy (I like the way the Brits pronounce that word … PRIV-uh-see…)

But, yeah, I admit to over-stepping anyone’s privacy. Honesty is both my best quality and my worst quality…

Albeit … my hobby … whenever I read a self-help book, it always says to ‘develop a hobby to avoid stress, anxiety … even depression’ … therefore… I ‘over-step’ … it is purely medicinal …

God only knows what I’d be like if I didn’t ‘over-step’ …

Oh, and tomorrow is trash collection day … I swear if I don’t have all the ‘receptacles’ full … then I mess something up just so I can throw it away …

(Pic me overstepping self baptism in River Jordan ... )

All reactions:

55Sage Sengbush, DeDe Lovett and 53 others